Saving Joy's Foot

Monday night Heather, Joy, DJ and I went to Capazelli's for some Italian food. As we were being seated our waitress was bantering about and as she left Joy remarked that she was pregnant and how she wanted to ask her when the baby was arriving, etc... I said to Joy to be careful, because maybe she's NOT pregnant. Joy assures me that she surely is, but I persist that she not ask about any new birth assignment. As the night went on the waitress came over and was chatting about work, her family and tying down all the mundane facets of life. At the right moment I asked the waitress, "So do you plan on having any more children?" "Oh my heavens, no!" she exclaimed and we all laughed as she left with the check. All eyes went to Joy and I handed her a napkin to dab away the perspiration pooling on her forehead.

And me, the hero of the night, how did I fare the next day at the Z-Market? I'm making a beverage purchase and feeling witty and chipper. Proud of how I was able to save Joy's foot from the abyss of her mouth. So the foxy young Argentinian woman behind the deli had just finished talking to the man at the cash register. "Is that your daughter?", I asked. He hands me my change and says, "She's my wife." GULP.................I was certainly glad that I had washed between my toes the night before.